Disappear.

"You don't have to know

where you're going,

just where it is

you want to be."

-Parachute.

Although I've abandoned you for the past week (almost), I've needed this. Right now, I have so many emotions, it's making me physically sick. All I want to do is cry...and go home. This isn't how college is supposed to feel, is it? I don't know if it's just me being scared to change from the summer months. But the past few days have been, to say the least, not fun. I don't really know what to say or think or do because I don't want people to get upset over someone like me. It's not that important. 

After a long and overly intense talk with my mom last night, many tears were shed and lots of emotions were unveiled. I feel like I shouldn't have said some things, even though I knew it was sort of what I was feeling. I just don't know at this point. My mom told me to focus on the good things and the things that make me happy. But that includes stuff like the beach, summer and California. None of which I have...so...

This lyric is getting me through today at least. I'm always so stressed about the future. Heck, I'm stressed about everything. No one moment is left unrelaxed. Maybe, I need someone to talk to, but that person is gone and I won't see her for the next four months or so. I'm just lost.

I need to get through this week. And then, the month. And then the semester. 

I can do this. Let's hope...